Changing weather = Changing moods

Anyone who says sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the rain."  ~Author Unknown

Here, here. Or is that hear, hear? Having danced in the rain in Paris I couldn't agree more.

Being Canadian means being obsessed with weather. There are a few people I have come across that wouldn't know how to start a conversation without the weather to rely on. We (Canadians) are fortunate to have such a variety in our weather and landscapes to choose from in which to surround ourselves. Side note: So glad not to be in the Calgary region today - SNOW! Yikes!

The weather this spring has been great (more rain for the gardens would be nice). I have noticed around Casa McKnight that the mood of the house definitely reflects the weather. On sunny days the kids, dogs, parents are little more easy going, life doesn't seem so rushed. The occasional rainy day is marked by slight increase in the whine factor (which could lead to an increase in the wine factor :), but as long as it is only a day or two, it is survivable. But when we get a string of days where we are more or less stuck inside due to extremes (rain, cold, wind, heat) the house harmony tends towards more of a cacophony.

While I am not a big fan of the heat waves we get in the GTA (I am one of the few who loved last summer's more temperate weather), I can easily weather a few extreme heat alerts knowing that in a few weeks cooler nights will prevail, with the days to follow shortly there after.

So mother nature bring it on ... just make sure that more often than not make sure we can all get outside for at least a little of time each day.

Mom-isms rock.

I usually start my blog off with a quote. Some obvious, others a little more obtuse. Today, in honour of Moms everywhere, I thought I would throw out a list of common quotes we Moms toss out on a regular basis.

Please feel free to add your own via comments.

• Money does not grow on trees.
• Don’t make that face or it’ll freeze in that position.
• Always change your underwear; you never know when you’ll have an accident.
• Be careful or you’ll put your eye out.
• What if everyone jumped off a cliff? Would you do it, too?
• If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.
• Don’t put that in your mouth; you don’t know where it’s been!
• Be careful what you wish for, it might come true.
• Don’t eat those, they will stunt your growth.
• If you don’t eat those, you will stunt your growth.
• What’s meant to be, is meant to be.
• Life happens.
• It doesn’t matter what you accomplish, I’ll always be proud of you.
• I hope that when you grow up, you have kids “Just Like you”!
• Because I’m your mother, and I said so. That’s why.
• If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times.
• If you fall out of that tree and break your leg, don’t come running to me.
• Because I said so.
• Just wait till your father gets home.
• I brought you into this world and I can take you OUT!!
• I’ve got eyes in the back of my head, that’s how.
• Does this look like a restaurant?
• Honestly… You’d lose your head if it wasn’t screwed on!
• Bored! How can you be bored?

Happy Mother's Day!

We can take a lesson from California

Nothing can be done except little by little." Charles Baudelaire

As someone who is nutritionally aware; reads food packaging labels (and understand them), keeps the fridge and pantry stocked with healthy food choices (and the occasional treat), and tries hard to set a good example for my family (which means having balance and including the once-in-a-while trek to the local ice shoppe), I tend to notice food related nuances in the places I visit.

Just back from California (loved San Diego), often recognized for their health-conscious way of life, there are several "little things" the food industry has done there that could ultimately make a big impact on North America's overall obesity issue. Things like:

• Starbuck's had skim and 2% milk instead of homogenized (3.25%) milk, along with half & half (5%) cream instead of table (10%) or coffee (15%) cream
• Several more juice and smoothie options at fast-food type establishments
• Every coffee shop I passed has a bowl of fresh fruit or fruit cups for purchase
• Most quick-dine places I passed had salads on their menu, with dressings served on the side in a lot of cases

And I am sure there are others (but I was only there for a day so didn't get that much time to truly investigate).

So for a little math (I love crunching numbers). If you have 2 ounces of cream in your coffee/tea every day, and you drink on average 2 mugs of said beverage everyday, switching from coffee cream to 2% milk would save you 31,645 calories a year. That equals 9 pounds of fat. So by making that one little change and doing nothing else you could loose almost 10 pounds in a year. That seems reason enough to me to make a switch, but the added bonus of reducing your fat intake and being more heart-healthy is gravy (low fat gravy).

So think about the other little things you could do to make your and your family a bit more healthy; parking purposefully AWAY from the mall entrance, making a family walk after dinner part of your daily routine, switching to fresh (organic if you can stand the price) veggies and fruits when ever possible. All these little things add up to a much healthier lifestyle and more energized life. I know we have slipped a little in most of these areas and I plan on regrouping starting now.

Gotta go, Whole Foods is calling my name.

Turn a corner and you are in a different world

I always loved running...it was something you could do by yourself, and under your own power. You could go in any direction, fast or slow as you wanted, fighting the wind if you felt like it, seeking out new sights just on the strength of your feet and the courage of your lungs." Jesse Owens

Seeking out new sights just on the strength of your feet. That captures a rave run I had today.

In San Diego for client work I took advantage of the three hour time difference to go for a run, and I am so glad I did. As I asked the concierge "which way to Balboa park" he pointed me left out of my hotel but warned it was it was an uphill climb all the way to the park. For a millisecond I considered heading the other way, but before I knew it I was on my way up the mile climb to perhaps one of the best runs of my life.

Why was it so great you ask. Did I run a PB? Nope, kept my usual plodding 9 minute mile pace. Was I feeling really strong? Not particularly; S&V chips, diet coke and a Chai latte does not a runner's diet make! But even if was a little off my stride at first, I found my groove the second I entered the park, and it continued to be fed by the feast of what I found inside its gates.

Flowers; Azealias, Anomones, Black Eye Susans, Rose of Sharon. People; couples of all kinds, rockers, skaters, runners, walkers, bikers. Dogs; big dogs, little dogs, dogs with all their gear, dogs with coats, dresses, even a dog with a hat! And more dogs. Miles and miles of paths and trails could have had me lost very quickly had I chosen a path less trodden. The path I did chose, while sometime paved, and other times covered by cobbled stone showed me a splendor of sights; geometric sculptures, Chinese gardens (yes, again with the flowers), fountains and more dogs (yes, again with the dogs) : )   I even saw a young Peruvian bride in the most colourful dress I have ever seen. There were museums and art galleries. A zoo, and I even saw Mary Poppins (ok, it was a statue, but it looked just like her).

I am not sure how long I ran, but it was one of those days I could have kept going and going. Reluctantly when I came to yet another fantastic foot bridge that led to another adventure of desert path, I turned around and retraced my steps back to the hotel and enjoyed the experience all over again.

Really the only thing that would have made this run even better is if my long time running partner and friend had been by my side to share the experience with. Next time.

Is it so wrong to want the best for your kids?

Warning: This post is the opposite of an Attitude of Gratitude.

In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made school boards." Mark Twain

How is it that we live in a country where a straight forward, fundamental, required element such as education can be so f****d up?!

Where two programs considered part of Ontario's Special Education Program (Enrichment and French Immersion) cannot be managed so that kids don't have to choose one over the other. We are stuck so that E cannot follow an IEP (individual education plan) unless we put her in an English school; and if we did that she would have the choice of two programs. That is right, not one but TWO.

So in the process of trying to figure out some stuff for E's schooling I had perhaps THE most frustrating 18 minute phone conversation of my life with the school principal. It went something like this (picking up the conversation 10 minutes into it) ...

Me: Well that doesn't make sense that we cannot take part in the one-day-a week program because she is in French Immersion. Isn't it all part of the same school board? 

Principal: It doesn't matter if it makes sense that is the way it is. You can voice your opinion but it won't make a difference. (Yes, she actually said that to me.)

Me: So by identifying that E qualifies for an IEP (individual education plan) if she stays where she is means nothing to her education at your school.

Principal: Correct. Nothing changes.

Me: So let me get this straight; you won't work with me, or other parents in this situation to find a solution so that our kids get the equal support as the kids on the other end of the spectrum.

Principal: It would be wrong for me to do that [advocate for that support].

18 minutes that seemed to go on for 3 hours. Truly bizarre. That is all I can say about this situation.

How is it that the kids that need more of a challenge than the regular curriculum generally offers (or teachers make time to provide) have to take a back seat to the kids who are struggling to keep up (and how she doesn't work with the parents to evaluate what really is in the best interest of those kids as well). How a school principal can take such little interest in ensuring all kids get what they need in the interest of towing the school board line and because it is easier is beyond me.

I can see why others (not me) take up the option of home schooling or private schools.

Get over it already

We achieve inner health only through forgiveness - the forgiveness not only of others but also of ourselves” Joshua Loth Liebman

We all make mistakes. Some big. Some small. Some that can be only classified as just plain idiotic cause we knew better before the mistake but that the behaviour we executed would caused the error and then were surprised by the outcome. Some call it shortsightedness. To me, especially when it is me that make the faux pas, it is just plain dumb.

So why is it so difficult to "get over it" when we make a mistake? And why does it seem that the time it takes to forgive is inversely proportional to the degree of stupidity/avoidability of the error? Compounding that complex equation is that we are all too ready to tell someone else "no worries" or "forget about it" when they make a mistake, but can't heed our own advice knowing that what is done is done and can't be undone so every minute or second spent reliving and wallowing is wasted time, and something else we can add to the list of remorseful actions. We humans are a weird bunch.

All that being said, you may be looking/expecting some sage words of advice on how to stop this ridiculous behaviour, or perhaps a platitude that can be recited in these instances of self-berating (and wondering what I did to stir up these thoughts enough to write about them ... well I am not telling). Unfortunately all I have to offer is; Get over it already! Nobody is perfect; we all make mistakes. Learn from them and try not to repeat the same mistake.

Wise words I myself need to consume, digest and carry forward.

Busy, busy, busy.

You are worried about seeing him spend his early years in doing nothing. What! Is it nothing to be happy? Nothing to skip, play, and run around all day long? Never in his life will he be so busy again." ~Jean-Jacques Rousseau

JJ was right on the money with this quote, and it can be applied to us grown up kids as well.

We all have busy lives (with or without kids), but how often do we take stock in what we are busying ourselves with. Work; meetings, reports, research, .... House; cleaning, fixing, finishing basements, gardening, ... Life: everthing else. My generation seem to have a fixation on doing it all, and doing it all right now, but not really noticing what exactly it is we are doing and how it affects those around us.

I have known for a while, but this week I realised (again) just how much this go-go-go attitude is affecting our kids. And not necessarily in a good way. When was the last time you saw a kid just lay back and watch the clouds go by for more than a nano-second? Or while away an afternoon just kinda hanging out? Or not feel withdrawal symptoms if they haven't interacted with some form of electronic devices in more than a couple of hours? Seriously; can a kid not survive a 4 minute car ride without their DS/PSP/iTouch?! (These questions can all be posed in relation to adults as well.) We just don't take the time (often enough) to slow down an just "be".

This past weekend was great; spent loads of time with the kids (mine and others) and tried really hard not to answer the question of "Mum can you  (fill in the blank) with me?" with the usual "I would love to but ...". So we rode bikes, went to the zoo, baked, threw the frisbee (Thanks P!), played in the garden and saw a movie while the house remained in a state of disarray, laundry (and dogs) lay unwashed, and other tasks on the perpetual To Do list remained undone. It really was a great weekend.

Similiar to this blog, I am going to try and maintain a commitment to just let things just happen, at least some of the time. That is not to say that homework will not take priority over bike riding when there truly is only time for one or the other. Or that the piano will go unpracticed on any given day (10 minutes really is an entirely reasonable amount of time to ask of an 8 and 5 year old), but when given the choice of playing outside with the kids or getting dinner on the table on by my own self-imposed dinner time, then bust open those doors cause here I come ...with perhaps a couple of T.O.'s to stir a sauce or flip a load of laundry.

So disappointed!

We have not inherited this world from our parents, we have borrowed it from our children." Native Canadian passage 

When you "borrow" something, doesn't that imply that we are going to give it back at some point in the future? Well after what appeared to be an abysmal local participation rate in Earth Hour last Saturday I think we should more accurately admit that we are stealing, rather than borrowing, the earth from our kids.

I was shocked, and disappointed, to see so few homes, let alone businesses (that weren't even open at 8:30 pm on a Saturday) shrouded by darkness. We drove through several towns/cities on the way home from a family event (who did turn the lights off at the appointed time, even with a house full of guests) and I'd say we saw fewer than 20 homes (on the 45 minute drive) darkened (and who knows if even these homes were actively participating in the Earth Hour event or were just out for the evening - I know, I know, I am such as pessimist).

We drove up our Main Street hoping to find that our own little community was being more environmentally responsible than the rest of the GTA only to be not totally disappointed. A few of the shops were completely dark, as were two of the restaurants (candles flickering on the tables, porch and entry ways), a couple of shops and another restaurant were definitely darker than usual, and then there was Starbucks ... usually bright and  full of lights seemed even more so (envision a fir tree in the middle of the forest in the the dead of night lit up with a zillion Christmas tree lights) against the dimmed backdrop of the rest of the street. 

Sigh. 

Oh well, with all the tools available to help us save energy (from iPhone apps - yes there are many apps for that - to programmable and remote accessed thermostats) that so few of us take advantage of, I guess it was too much to expect people to manually turn lights off for an hour. Who knows what could have happened; someone could have sprained a finger flipping a switch or we could have actually made a difference. 

Set your own path

Understand that the right to choose your own path is a sacred privilege. Use it. Dwell in possibility."  Oprah Winfrey

Really!? An Oprah quote! Come on!

This is what most people who know me would say if they were reading my blog. (Are any of you out there?) My Mum would definitely be rolling her eyes and tsk-tsking me. (But I don't have to worry about that because she refused to learn to use the computer. A blog topic for another day.) I often teased her that she got her philosophy degree from the University of Oprah. She, my mother not Oprah, would often espouse Oprah's perspectives and doctrines at me, usually when I had done something she didn't agree with. But when I read this quote it really struck a cord in me.

One thing that makes me crazy are people who dwell on what could have been rather than focusing on what could be; talking about the decision(s) you made 1, 2, 10, or even 20 years ago, and how everything since then has sucked. You know these conversations, they usually start with "Only if I ..." or "I wish I had ...". Get over it already. Today is today, and you can't get back yesterday, and if you spend all of today thinking about yesterday instead of enjoying it and planning for what you want to achieve tomorrow then you will have wasted yet another day.

Harsh? Perhaps. (Rarely am I accused of being too subtle.) But having the ability to choose my own path is something that I try very hard not to take for granted. That is not to say that I never fall into the pit of self-wallowing. We all do. But the pits I fall into tend to be shallow and narrow, and I fill them in as quickly as I can so that I can move on to my next goal. Speaking of which; does anyone have words of wisdom to share on reupholstering a couch?

Did you miss me? (That is rhetorical BTW)

Absence diminishes little passions and increases great ones, as wind extinguishes candles and fans a fire." Francois de la Rochefoucauld

So it has been a while, with no reason or excuse for the absence other than losing the grove and not focusing my attention on getting it back. Why is it so easy to keep up bad habits, and so often difficult to maintain good ones?  (Another rhetorical question.) A couple of times, after a few weeks of not blogging I went to start again, only to be sieged by thoughts of failure "It has been too long to start again.", "Nobody will bother reading now that you have stopped writing for so long", etc... Silliness I realised after a friend of mine encouraged me back to blogging with the sage words of encouragement and blogging wisdom "I understand why pepole stop, because it is thankless and it goes on forever, but I hope you will consider starting again strictly for the love of the game."

So from the dark genius of WO to wise words of H. Stanley Judd:

Don't be afraid to fail. Don't waste energy trying to cover up failure. Learn from your failures and go on to the next challenge. It's OK to fail. If you're not failing, you're not growing.” H. Stanley Judd.

I pick up the proverbial pen to get back at it, along with a couple other Q210 focused efforts, and hope you will forgive my absence and continue (or start) to follow, and participate in, my musing of pursing an attitude of gratitude.

Let the games begin!

Post 31 - So Proud to be Canadian

The most important thing in the Olympic Games is not to win but to take part, just as the most important thing in life is not the triumph but the struggle. The essential thing is not to have conquered but to have fought well." The Olympic Creed

With glowing hearts Canadians are ready to be the world's stage for the next 16 days, and I couldn't be more proud.

Even amidst the reports of 30+ athletes failing their doping tests (no Canucks in the group), mother nature not exactly smiling her favour on the snow-dependent venues, or even the crazed security measures at Pearson (and likely Vancouver) airport; there is nothing that can dampen this Canadian's Olympic spirit.

I am grateful to be able to share these next couple of weeks with my kids; sitting next to them as they are exposed to new sports like Skeleton and Nordic Combined (what are the going to shoot asked E), as well as the favourites like Figure Skating and of course Hockey. Whether we win the first or last gold medal is not important, it is that we, as a nation, have come together to support and champion these games and our athletes. That from far and wide, we stand with pride and cheer all those who have made it to the games. Because really, that is the achievement; the medals won are the icing on the cake.

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

Post 31 - The beauty of freshly fallen snow

Kindness is like snow - it beautifies everything it covers”

Like so many Canadians, weather is one of my past times. That is not to say I spend an inordinate amount of time tracking storms or clouds or wind patterns (that is just geeky), but I am um usually on top of the weather forecast for at least the next couple of days. So this morning I was taken by surprise to see a few centimetres (that is an inch or so for my American readers) of white fluffy stuff as I left the house for my morning run.

At this sight; everything fresh, and clean, and bright (as bright as it can be at 5 am on winter's morning), my mood was lifted. Gone was the drag of not quite being awake yet; replaced by a smile and positive perspective on the day.

Amazing what a little bit of frozen, crystalized rain (for all of you who consider snow anther 4-letter word) can do for someone.

Now, how many days until we leave for Florida?

The Saints bring it home

Post 30 - Support from a city

Good things come to those who wait." Proverb

Okay, so the New Orleans Saints haven't exactly been sitting around waiting for the Super Bowl to land in their lap for the past 43 years (although if you look at their record since their inception in 1967 that might be debated; it took them fifteen seasons to rack up a record of more wins than losses in a year - yikes!). But that is history.

The Saints' (no longer will they be called "The Aints") victory symbolised New Orleans’ resurgence after the worst natural disaster in US history which left 85 per cent of the city under water and sparked mass evacuations. Tom Benson, the owner of The Saints put it succintly: 'Not only the city but the entire state of Louisiana and New Orleans is back. This win shows the whole world we’re back."

You can be sure the festivities leading up to this year's Mardi Gras (Tuesday, February 16) is going to be like nothing the city has seen before.

Go Saints ... I love it when the underdog wins!

We can set our own rules

Post 29 - Words to live by

There is only one person who is capable to set limits to your growth... it is you!" Author Unknown

Everyone at some point in time is "working" on something; being a better parent, spouse, friend ..., losing weight/gaining weight, setting a PB in whatever sport it is you part take in. You get the picture. Many of us will abandon these "works in progress" for many reasons (or excuses as the case may be); too tired, too hungry, too sore (insert appendage name here), going on vacation, not going on vacation, etc. Why do we give up? Why do we set unrealistic expectations only to have ourselves dash them at a moments notice. And then, even when we do fall off whatever wagon we are riding at the time, why don't we just pick ourselves and continue on the journey rather than doling out the punishment of having to return to the start line?

This is life, not a game of Monopoly; we don' have to pass GO everytime in order to gain something.

So as I embark on my own personal challenge over the next couple of weeks, I am dedicated to my own success. That being said, I am not going to toss all the gains I make a the first slip (if there is one). I will just pick myself up and continue on. Because after all I am only human, and none of us is perfect (no matter how hard we try to be or our mothers tell us we are).

Still impactful 8 years later

Post 28 - Remembering those lost

We will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends. Martin Luther King, Jr.

While I am often in NYC, I haven't been by Ground Zero in several years. This time it was unavoidable (not that I have avoided the area, it just hasn't been near where I was for those other visits) as my hotel was right down the street, and my client's office was literally on the other side of the street to where the Towers once stood; and is now a construction pit just reaching surface level in the building stage.

I was surprised at my emotional reaction as I am generally not a very outwardly emotional individual (understatement of the year perhaps). As I walked past the site I found myself choked up at the memory of that day; for those who were lost, those left behind, and my own reaction watching the news as it happened while I nursed my month old baby girl. It is the only time, and the feeling didn't last long, that I questioned bringing a new life into this world. As I walked into the World Financial Tower, gathering my composure, I was struck again, harder (actual tears), by the memorial for the lives lost who were member of my client's team. Their names, and a list of six single words describing them and who they were immortalized in marble. So simple. So beautiful.

These reminders reminded me to be thankful that there are teams of people looking out for me and my family so that this kind of tragegy can be avoided. So apropos to yesterday's post; I will smile at the security teams, and fill out yet another form, and answer the same questions time and time again without complaint if it means that no one ever has to memorialize the life of someone lost to an act of terror ever again.

She who laughs last laughs loudest

Post 27 - Laughing it off

Even if there is nothing to laugh about, laugh on credit. Unknown

Not many would find much to laugh about at Pearson Airports increase boarder security processes. They have doubled the staff and it now takes (at least) twice as long to get through the security checks. Reminiscent of the high-tech Cancun airport where you press a button to see if you get a green light (no bag inspection), or red light (be prepared to have all your bags' contents spilled for the world to see), you now step on a plastic mat to see whether the arrow points you left (every bag is inspected), or right (random bag check - much faster FYI). Very clever.

In any case, I was filtered to the left and it took FOREVER to get through the line up. But as these clearly new inspectors did their job,what else can you do but laugh it off. I guess you could bitch and complain (as you hear many doing), but where is that going to get you, except perhaps standing in line even longer. As I chatted and joked with the British bloke in front of me, I think the inspectors appreciated us taking their prodding and invasion of privacy in stride.

So even though I was running a bit tight for time to catch my flight, it put me (and I think those around me) in a better mood by not making a crappy situation worse by turning into a sour puss.

Seeing the err of my ways ... better late than never .. right?

Post 27 - Admitting I am wrong, and apologizing

An apology is the superglue of life.  It can repair just about anything.  Lynn Johnston

So after a crappy day where an inanimate object received my full compliment of patience (seriously, I didn't even have patience for the dogs when the barked to come in from the snow squalls), our night went something like this:

Mom (me): Yelling at kid 1for something that didn't deserve the tone they received
Kid 1: "OK mummy"
Mom: Yelling at kid 2 for something equally as trivial
Kid 2: "I'm sorry mummy"
Repeat.
Mom: "I am sorry kids. Reeeaalllly sorry. Mum had a crappy day and I shouldn't have yelled at you. I love you very much, even when I am yelling, and I will work really hard not to yell so much tomorrow. I love you."
Kids: "We love you too. Can we have ice cream now?"
Mom: No (I didn't yell THAT loud)

Yeah, so, I scored no "good mommy points" today. At all. May have even lost some that I have accrued up to now. Sigh. Tomorrow is another day, and I promise that I won't yell at my kids at all ... did I mention I'm out of town for the day.  :)  Lucky kids.

Mirror of Erised

Post 26 - Happy with what I have

Desire is the starting point of all achievement, not a hope, not a wish, but a keen pulsating desire which transcends everything.” Napolean

E & I just finished reading Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, I had forgotten what a great book it is.

We spent a lot of time talking about the Mirror of Erised (desire) and its inscription (I show not your face but your heart's desire); E asked what I would see if we looked into the mirror. Good question. I thought about it for a minute. Would I see myself with bank statements that showed the mortgage paid off, enough money for the kids' education and a care-free retirement? Me running and winning the Boston Marathon and the DCR Hockey league playoffs? I don't think so (but those things would be cool). I am pretty sure that I could look into that mirror and see pretty much what I have now;a happy and healthy family, a good home, the ability to provide a few "extras" for the kids like summer camp and a vacation here and there, and people around me that I care for and that care about me.

Sure it would be nice to be finanically care-free, but is there ever really "enough" of anything once you start down that path? I can't answer that question. So I am going to be happy with what we have, and will focus my energy on acheiving goals I set for myself; not because I have to keep up with what others have or what media tells me I should want, but rather because that is just who I am.

Some are silver, others gold

Post 25 - Girlfriends

Friends are like stars... you don't always see them, but you know they're always there."

I consider myself incredibly fortunate when it comes to the friendships I have shared over the years. I have had the same BFF for 92.5% of my life. Even though we have lived thousands of kilometres apart for more than 25 years, she is always in my thoughts and heart. That is not to say there haven' t been times in that 35+ years when weeks go by without communication, there have been. Or that we haven't missed any of the major milestones in each other lives, we have. But regardless of time or event gone by, I know that she is there with me, and vise versa.

I have other friends with whom I am extremely close, and not quite sure how that happened (but am so very thankful that it did). For anyone who knows me (really knows me) understands that I am not someone who lets other people "in" easily. That isn't to say that I have been call aloof or stand-offish (at least not to my face), it is just that, well honestly I don't know why that is, it just is. But there are a couple of people who have penetrated that outer shell, and for that I am thankful.

These "surprise" friendships have added a lot to my life. Fun. Perspective. Excitement. Support. Reality checks. And luckily for me, other friends.

One particular group, who interestingly enough I went to high school (all) and university (all but 1) with, but didn't really get to know until the connector of our group was getting married. Twelve years later, five marriages, 12 kids, a few house moves, one divorce, several pets and an engagement later, we are still going strong, and I dare say, getting stronger with each passing year. I am honoured to be counted as one of group.

So for everyone who has even one close girl friend, and I mean relationship close, not geographic proximity close (that is just a bonus), be thankful, because they are the sisters that fate gave you, and should be cherished for the gift that they are.

Giving more than money

Post 24 - Connecting with those less fortunate

It is every man's obligation to put back into the world at least the equivalent of what he takes out of it." Albert Einstein

So yesterday the Prescient team headed out on its 2nd volunteering expedition at Evergreen Youth Mission.  Our offering for the day was to prep and serve dinner to youths (16 - 25) who, for many different reasons, are in need of a safe place to go, and a free meal.

Vlad, who runs the meal program at the facility, put us to work pulling together a meal that I may have to copy for my own family; it certainly wasn't the menu I was expecting. All of our chopping of fresh fruits (7 in all) and veggies, baking of whole grain rice and basting of chicken resulted in a menu offering of; lemon/garlic baked chicken, herbed (with fresh herbs) rice, sauteed veggies, mixed green salad for dinner, and fresh fruit salad for dessert.

Not what you would expect (at least it wasn't what I was expecting) at a facility that has been around since the early 1900's (Evergreen has been around since 1896), and which hosted more than 185,000 visits to their programs and services from more than 18,000 individuals. Very impressive.

I am very grateful that the company I work for, and the individuals I work with, all believe in giving back to the community in which we live and work. It was a great experience, and I would happily go back and voluneer at YSM again. (Although next time I think Catherine and I will go a bit early and churn out some baked goods to go along with all that healthy stuff. :)

Its okay to change the plan ... right?

Day 23 - Flexibility (and not the toe touching kind)

Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans." John Lennon

So while I am someone who more often adheres to such adages as "A failure to plan is a plan to fail." and "A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow." than the Lennon quote above, I do see (now) that there is a balance to be found between the two perspectives.

I will likely always be more inclined to set out a plan (I love lists) for my day/week ahead, whether it be completing work related tasks, or making sure that there are ample supplies in the fridge/pantry for the upcoming week's meals, or even sussing out possible activities for the kids on the weekends so that I am at least somewhat prepared for the inevitable question of "what can I/we do now?" that surfaces at least once each Saturday and Sunday. I don't see that as a bad thing (no A-type would), or that I am missing out on life during those times of planning. But as time ticks on (faster and faster it seems) I am more able to let things happen as they may, and accept the other perspective of "let's see what happens" more often, finding that flexibility (even if I never will be able to touch my toes) that helps ensure I don't miss those amazing moments of spontenaiety that people call Life.

Mum still rocks.

Day 21 - Still the apple in my son's eye.

Happy is the son whose faith in his mother remains unchallenged.” Louisa May-Alcott

Many people told me (after I had our son) that I would never know another relationship quite like the one a mother shares with her son. Mothers and daughters are close; they share "the girl thing", but the bond that forms between mother and son is something very few can come between.

Now back then I thought these people were all a little whacked. Seriously; how could a mother/child connection be that different simply based on the sex of the child. Sure there would be difference based on personality types, interests (as the child grew older), and the usual day to day stuff. But a bond, that strong of a bond, established simply because the child is a boy. Yeah, whatever!

But you know what, it is true.

Now let me set the record straight; I, without equivocation, deliberation or contemplation, love my children, both by children with all my heart. That is not to say there are days I don't LIKE one or both of them very much because of a rare, but intense, situation at hand. But today, as J curled up on my lap to snuggle, and how I, yes me, was able to flip his mood from sour puss to happy-go-lucky, made me realise that we have something just a little bit different than the dynamic I have with E. Not better. Not stronger. Not anything that I can put my finger on. But it is there.

Now whether that is because he is my "baby" (I can hear him groaning as I type that) or because he is my baby boy, I can't say for sure. But today I felt what all those people were telling me about and it made me sigh; a very deep, long, happy sigh. Thanks J.

Proud to be Canadian

Day 20 - Haitians still need our help

“Life is a gift, and it offers us the privilege, opportunity, and responsibility to give something back.”

Well done fellow Canadians! Last night's Canada for Haiti/Ensemble Pour Haiti telethons raised $16 million dollars, not including the funds that the Canadian government will kick in as part of their dollar for dollar matching program.

The money raised during the telethon will be distributed equally among a coalition of nine large Canadian non-governmental organizations — including World Vision Canada, Canadian Red Cross Society, UNICEF Canada, Oxfam Canada and Save the Children Canada — with the funds exclusively earmarked for Haiti.

If you haven't yet reached out to help Haiti, or are ready to contribute a little bit more (take your lunch/coffee to work for day/week/month and give that $5 or $25 or $100 to those who have been left with nothing.  No amount is too small (just remember most charities only provide donation reciepts for $10 or more).

The Canadian telethon number is open 1-877-51HAITI (42484) or you can give online at canadaforhaiti.com.  For more dontation options, check out my blog post for Day 12 for a list of recognized Canadian charities, or check our the complete list of registered Canadian charities.

It is said with good intentions

Day 19 – Being able to accept help, even when unsolicited

I am always ready to learn although I do not always like being taught." W. Churchill

Everyone excels at something; sports, cooking, writing, gardening, model plane building, sleeping ... there is always something we do well. So well that sometimes people ask us for our help or assistance as they tackle said area of expertise. On the flip side of that, there are areas in each of our lives, whether it is something we have toiling at for decades or a new endeavour we have just jumped into, that we are in need of more guidance and council then the previously mentioned activity group. And it is here where we often become the recipient of advice of others. Sometimes solicited; sometimes not.

For me, my most recent new arena, literally, is hockey. Now like many Canadians, I had skates laced onto my feet at an early age (even though my parents are not skaters). Being a girl child growing up in Quebec that meant that I either figure skated or played ringette (ring-what? some of you are saying –picture hockey with a large rubber ring instead of a puck, and sticks with no blades). I figure skated. That is not to say that hockey is foreign to me. Played street hockey with the boys in my neighbourhood, and spending my formative years in Montreal turned me into a Habs fan (much to the dismay of my son who has taken to the dark side of cheering for the ever faltering Maple Leafs. Sigh.) So I really like hockey.

Many would start with a skills class or clinic. I am not many. I jumped whole hog into the sport forking out way too much for hockey equipment (how do parents with multiple kids playing afford it!) and joining a great women’s league.
Now as far as my team’s skills go, we range from novice (is there a term for a lower skills level?) to very good. I fall somewhere in the mid-bottom range of that scale (being a proficient skater, both forwards and backwards, helps my rating) so I am very open to suggestions on how I can improve my game. And lucky for me there are a couple of team mates who are more than willing, quite eager actually, to offer up that needed advice throughout the game.

For me, this is okay. For others, a continuous, unsolicited, reeling of “do this”, “go there”, “good girl” (gotta admit, that last one bugs me a bit), is enough to push them to the border of breeching our league’s non-contact rule.
So I am thankful that I am able to accept the counsel of others as it is meant; helpful. And that as long as there aren’t too many “good girls” or “dears” thrown into the mix (and yes, this advice is coming from other women around my age), then I won’t have to worry about chalking up too many penalty minutes checking my own team mates into the boards.

It's all in the follow through

Day 18 Gratitude - The ability to follow through

A six-word formula for success:

Think things through - then follow through”

So simple, yet apparently difficult to execute.

One of the principal rules of good project management is to deliver what you promise. Nothing more. Nothing less. Today,many people/companies/products miss the mark on this, on both the under and over side of the equation. I think if we simply, and honestly, committed to things we are confident we can achieve/perform/deliver then life would be simpler all the way around.

That is not to say that we shouldn’t look to broaden our skill sets or be innovative, quite the contrary. I am not advocating to sticking to what you know (oh, that would be good topic for another day), how boring would that be. But in a world where we are bombarded with promises in every shape and form, of which very few are delivered upon, it would be a welcomed relief (at least by this blogger) to get what I was promised; what I expected. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Not my kids; at least not yet

Day 17 Gratitude - Kids access to social media still under our thumb (sort of)

The more elaborate our means of communication, the less we communicate. J.Priestly

The NYT posted an article today (thanks JM for sharing) about how a recent study that kids between the ages 8 to 18 spend more than seven and a half hours a day (that is 53 hours a week)on media related devices (smart phone, TV, computer - you get the picture). And because of this groups apparent ability and innate need to multitask (and we wonder why so may kids are thought to have ADD), this number actually extrapolates to a whopping 11 hours a day!

Add in the hours in a day they can't use their devices; six school hours (that excludes lunch hour), and eight hours for sleeping - do the math - it adds up to 25 hours a day! So this age group would have to be texting or on FB or tweeting while they sleep to squeeze it all in. So where do home work, extracurricular activities and part time jobs fit into the mix? Man, no wonder kids today are so tired.

In our house this is not yet a reality. A bit on the stringent side of the coin, E&J get no screen time (defined as TV, computer, DS, PS3, Wii) during the week once breakfast has been consumed (TV before brekkie was reinstituted after we realised our youngest in definitely NOT a morning person and the world of difference - for the better - 15 minutes of TV makes to allow him to wake up a bit before having to interact with the rest of the world) or on weekends between breakfast and dinner. Be it good or bad, thems the rules. (Of course rules were meant to be broken and when G&I need to get something done a movie has been known to spontaneously start on the TV or the Wii/PS3 activated.)

Yes I know, the time is coming where this won't be the case, and we will have to ease up on the electronic lock down. But, for now, I am grateful that what is the daily average for kids in the Kaiser Family Foundation study, is more than our kids average weekly screen time total, and, for the most part, our kids are OK with that.

Never say never, cause you never know

Day 16 Gratitude - The gift of prose

Both my Mum and my sister have Sarah Ban Breathnach's book; Simple abundance: a daybook of comfort and joy. They have been reading, and promoting it for years. "Not for me" I always said to myself every time I saw the book or was encouraged to pick it up. Who knew? I came across the following quote by Ms. Ban Breathnach's and it pretty much sums up what this blog is all about.

So enjoy this brief prose (while I go eat some crow).

You simply will not be the same person two months from now after consciously giving thanks each day for the abundance that exists in your life. And you will have set in motion an ancient spiritual law: the more you have and are grateful for, the more will be given you.”

And I hope it comes true for me (feel free to let me know come Spring if you think it has).

The nectar of life

Day 15 Gratitude – Access to fresh, clean water

In 1993 National Geographic wrote;

All the water that will ever be is, right now.

Which, when you think about the fact that;

• 71% of earth is covered in water.
• One in six people do not have access to a clean/safe water source.
• The world’s population grew by 77 million people in 2009.

That means that 12.3 million more people are without water today than this time last year. Very scary.

So why all the doom-and-gloom about water you ask?

Well I was trying to figure out a way to convey to my kids, once again, how important it is not to waste water. I thought if I could quantify it for them (big numbers seem to hit home with J), it might be the thing that finally gets them to turn the tap off while they brush their teeth or wash their face. But I then I thought these numbers might be a bit much for them.

So I asked them to tell me something they thought didn’t need water (either to stay alive or be produced). They eliminated the obvious; plants, food, people, animals, fish, trees ... But then came the more abstract; Paper? Cars? Plastic? When I explained to them that EVERYTHING relies on water at some point, it started to sink in I think. Then E brought up that people in Haiti didn’t have any water; did that mean they were going to die? I was honest; said yes, some would die partially because of a lack of water. That made both of them quiet. Had I gone too far? Were we in for an evening of nightmares?

Nope.

What happened next was J telling E that she didn’t need to fill a cup with water for brushing her teeth, she could share his.

Lions and tigers and oranutangs

Day 14 Gratitude – World class zoo in my backyard; well almost

From Dr. Seuss' "If I ran the zoo"

My new zoo, McGrew zoo, will make people talk.
My new zoo, McGrew zoo, will make people gawk.

Taking advantage of the plus 1 degree warm weather (that is 32 degrees for my US readers) G and the kids made the short trip to spend the afternoon at to the Toronto zoo while I stayed at home and sloshed my way through two gallons (that is 9.5 litres for us Canadians) of paint fixing up the basement walls.

Now we are no strangers to the zoo (please try and restrain yourselves from too many comments), and have be members (not residents) since E was a baby and have found that visiting in the winter months is great as the animals are much more active than they are in the hot summer months, and there are no crowds to deal with.

Today the kids came back more animated as usual and could barely contain themselves while trying to tell me, talking over each other as they spoke, about the baby orangutan they had seen today. They chatted on for a good five minutes about this cute primate. When I asked what else they saw they each names several animals; arctic wolf, polar bears, spectacled cobra, Siberian tiger, snowy owl (just like Hedwig from Harry Potter E reminded me), and did I mention the orangutans. It occurred to me how great it is that my kids get to see and learn about more animals first hand than the raccoons and rabbits that frequent our yard. I am sure when I was five I didn’t know that orangutans stayed with their mother for seven years, or that like humans they have a set of 32 teeth only with two much larger point (canine) teeth. Things a five year old can say that make you go “Huh”.
So I am grateful to have such an entertaining and educational resource almost in my back yard, and that it offers up something different each time we go.

Yin and Yang; not sure which on I am.

Day 13 Gratitude - A husband who shares the load (and not just laundry).

"Without the two there cannot be the One."

Chang Tsai, (1020-1078)

Who ever said that a marriage was 50/50 situation has never been married. I have yet to see an coupledom relationship where everything balances out in the end in each half of the partnership doing half the work, taking care of half the responsibilities, or contributing half the effort to whatever task is at hand.

And I am not saying that it is always the same partner on the upside of this imbalance. Such is the case in our house. While I manage/arrange/schedule (whatever the correct word it) much of what happens at Casa McKnight, my better half is always there when I need him (even before he is asked a lot of the time). There are many days, particularly in support of my work, where he carries more than his share. Whether it is solo-parenting while I jet off for client work, or tackling projects that usually start with the me saying "So honey, I was thinking" or "What do you think about (fill in DIY project details here)", G is there, ready, able, and most of the time willing without too much coersion, to share the load.

So while the nature of our individual personalities create a balanced yin and yang home atmosphere, I am very thankful that whether it is doing the laundry, cooking dinner, or signing on for another one of my "brilliant ideas" my husband is always there, by my side, sharing the load.

Please support Haiti

Day 12 Gratitude - Ability to give

With all that is news reports streaming in from Haiti, I am particularly happy that the part of Canada I live in is relatively safe from the catastrophic affects of rapid onset geological natural disasters. And thankful that our family is able to donate towards the Haiti earthquake relief effort.

So today, rather than posting a stream of consciousness that centres on me, I ask that you take the time you would have dedicated to reading my blog (several times no doubt :), posting comments and forwarding the link to all your friends and family, and redirect it to the website of the support organisation of your choice, and make donation to their Haiti relief fund. For every eligible dollar donated by individual Canadians, the Government of Canada will contribute one dollar to the Haiti Earthquake Relief Fund, up to a total of $50 million. So your financial support is doubly important.

Here are a just a few sites that you can go to in order to lend your support to the Haitians affected by this disaster. Charities are also taking donations via telephone, text message and email.

Before making a donation, please check to make sure it is a registered charity via teh CRA’s online database of registered charities. (All sites below are registered Canadian charities.)

Information on the CIDA Haiti Earthquake Relief Fund

Canadian Red Cross - The Canadian Red Cross sent $200,000 immediately to support emergency relief efforts on the ground and is on standby to provide additional emergency assistance.

UNICEF Canada - An income tax receipt will be issued for all donations $25 or more. For donations less than $25, receipts will be issued upon request.

United Nations World Food Programme

Médecins Sans Frontières Canada/Doctors Without Borders is setting up clinics to replace damaged medical facilities in Haiti.

World Vision is preparing to distribute emergency supplies to those affected by the earthquake.

Oxfam Canada is taking donations for the Humanitarian Coalition Appeal For Haiti.

Health Partners International of Canada is supplying medical aid.

The Humanitarian Coalition — Care/Oxfam Canada/Oxfam Quebec/Save the Children. In collaboration with a number of organizations

Atchoo! Gadzundheit.

Day 11 Gratitude - Good health (even when I am sick)

After a week of having a cold that has sapped my energy, given me a non-stop headache, and annoyed me (and those around me) with a hacking cough I am glad to say I am on the mend. This little bit of whinging aside; I am generally a healthy individual. I rarely catch what the kids bring home, stomach bugs rarely grab a hold of me even if they sweep through everyone else in the house (including the dogs), and it is uncommon that I miss anything (work, kids’ events, social commitments) due to any kind of ailment. And for that I am very grateful.

Now this amazing fortitude came to me later in life. As a kid, as my mother is apt to remind me, it seems like I was often sick. From simple sniffles to almost annual bouts of bronchitis and the occasional case of pneumonia, ask anyone in my family, it was I who was the germ magnet. My sister on the other hand was the opposite, she, again, according to our family’s almanac (aka: my mother), never missed a day of school because of being sick. That is not to say I missed much school on this account either because in our house you had to be puking up an internal organ or have a fever hot enough to fry an egg on your forehead before permission was given to stay home; tough love apparently is the best way to build immunity. :) (A philosophy I find myself following with my own kids sometimes.)

But this is contrary to today’s rules. (And kids seem to be sick more often today than they were back when I was in school.)The expectation today, be it right, wrong, or more likely, somewhere in between, if your kid even so much as sniffles you are expected to keep them home; triple dose them with Echinacea, vitamin C and TLC’ and sterilizing every surface they come in even close contact with. I say nay. I adhere more to the “Everyone will eat a peck of dirt before they die” philosophy, and what does't kill you makes you stronger.

So while I digressed from today’s gratitude a little bit (I like to think of it as a detour rather than departure), I come back to reiterate that I am truly thankful for my health, and the good health of my family and friends. And wish everyone reading my blog a very healthy (and thankful) 2010.

More reliable than the postal service

Day 10 Gratitude - Friends Part 1 - My running buddy  

 There are not many people who opt to get out of bed on a cold Canadian winter morning before 5 am by choice. Even fewer of those people who willingly, albeit begrudgingly sometimes, then put on the corresponding requisite number of layers of clothing to the number of degrees below zero it is outside (windshield factored in exponentially), then lace up their running shoes and meet you at the designated corner to get in a few miles before the rest of the (sane) world wakes up.

I am extremely fortunate, and grateful, to have such a friend. We are well into our second decade of running together, and have run through it all; hail, snow, sleet, rain, blistering heat, mind numbing cold, marriage, pregnancies (5 between us), 3 puppies, illness, death of loved ones, good times, challenging times. I dare say there hasn't been a topic we haven't covered (much to the chagrin of our husbands) during the thousands of kilometres we have run.

So for her friendship, encouragement, egging on (in a good kind of way) and for always being at the same bat corners at the same bat time, every time, I am truly grateful for my running buddy.

Thanks P!

Home is where the dog hair lies

Day 9 Gratitude - Pets

We are a family that loves animals. We have two labs, a bunch of fish and the occasional extra four legged freind sourced from dog sitting for a friend or a stray that followed me home (I seem to be a magnet for that kind of thing). Each has their own personality and contibute more than their share of love and companionship to our home. Our girls are also very protective of their "people". More than once our labs have demonstrated valour and bravery (at least in their own minds) when it came to a dodgy character (never trust a man in a green parka, orange mitts and red hat) or situation (isn't that raft a little far from the shore to be swimming to it).

A pet's protective nature must be internalized very quickly. Case in point; Angel, the golden retreiver puppy out in BC who took on a cougar to save her "boy". At only eighteen months her instinct and loyalty was honed enough that even before the cat showed up, she stuck close to her human companion and then protected him without hesistation when the earlier perceived threat materialized. Amazing.

Now I am not sure our girls would jump into a cat fight (literally) with a cougar (thankfully the GTA is not known for its big cat sightings), but I know I feel better when they are with the kids at the park, or beach, or forest for the extra sets of eyes and their ability to sound a warning if something isn't quite right.

There ain't no flies on us!

Day 8 Gratitude - Summer Camp

Everyone once in a while, or sometimes more frequently, I have an "ah-ha" moment on just how great my parents were when I was growning up. Now don't get me wrong, I have many "Aargghhhg" and "I still can't believie they said/did that" moments as well; my parents were far from perfect. But they did a lot of things right. Sending me away at the tender age of seven for two weeks of sleep away camp was one of those "great" things. (Although I still wonder why they sent me away and never my older sister? Something for another blog.)

As we all settle into winter's drafty, cold, dull, blustery days many parents who work out of the home are already thinking about summer. And when we think about summer, we think about school being out. And with no school, that means we need to figure out what we are going to do to make sure our kids have tons of fun and are so exhausted by the end of the day they don't complain about going to bed when the sun is still up. In our house that means summer camp. Our eldest, at my vehement encouragement, and reluctant enthusiasm of her Dad, is taking the plunge into the foray of summer camp. At this point I amWAY more excited about it than she it, but I am confident she will get there; even if it is two days after she actually gets to camp.

Am I living vicariosly though my daughter; absolutely. Some of my best memories of all time between the ages of seven and 16 are from summer camp. The four or six weeks I spent at Kamp Kanawana in the Quebec Laurentiens each of those summers taught me so many things while I was there, and even more now that I look back. Camp is definitely one of THE most defining factors of my life. That experience is something I thank my parents for often, and am grateful that we are in a position to be able to extend the same opportunity to our kids.

So while E won't be caring on as the fourth generation of my family to go to Kanawana, I have no doubt (even though she has hers) that her time at sleep away camp this summer will be as smooth as a J-stroke on a calm lake in the early mist of summer's morning, and that it will be the first of her many summers of great sleep away camp experiences.

Fleece, it will warm your heart (or any other body part)

Day 7 Gratitude - Fleece

What else do I need to say. Fleece; be it technical micro fleece, or puffy, fluffy, tuffy, soft polar fleece, or just plain old, run of the mill, general fleece; whether it is made from scratch or recycled water bottles ... Fleece rocks! I would challenge anyone to convince me otherwise.

Still you are asking why fleece is so great? Well, 

• It doesn't go all pilly,
• Even an inexpensive fleece can be super comfortable and cosy,
• You can wash it a million times and it doesn't lose its shape,
• It doesn't keep the stink if you happen to sweat in it ... a lot!,
• You can find it in all sorts of colours, weights and forms (you have got to try fleece socks),
• Even the messiest kid would have a hard time staining it,
• It dries pretty quickly if say you get tossed in a pool unexpectedly, and on that note,
• It is resistant to chlorine. So even if you do get thrown in a pool wearing your favourite fleece, it won't get wrecked.

And most important, did I mention how warm and comfy it is.

If you are wondering where this need to extol the virtues of a common material came from ... you guessed it, a long run this morning (early this morning) in minus 18 degree weather ... Yep, thank goodness for fleece. :)

Niagara Falls - truly a wonder

Day 6 Gratitude - Mother Nature (part 1)

As my freinds, family and faithful readers (all four of you) know, I am a huge fan of the outdoors. Doesn't matter to me if it is going for a run at 5 am on a cold winter's weekday morning, or lazed out on a dock on the skirts of Lake Mississauga with a bevvie closed at hand, or suffering throught the rain we alwasy seem to get on our annual camping trip to Arrowhead provincial park - I love it all. But admit I sometimes take it for granted.

Today I was given a reminder in humility with a sight of Niagara Falls. Breath taking. The kids were even wow'd enough to forget they were cold and hungry. Sun shining. Mist billowing. Rainbow shining brightly. Crystal covered branches. Winter scenes just don't get much better than this.

So today I am thankful to be so lucky to live a stone's throw away from one of the natural wonders of the world.

Great Wolf what! Not again.

Day 5 Gratitude - Kids (part 1)

Big, little, or anywhere in between, kids can help you put perspective on things.

So, on occasion, I have been called practical, sensible, pragmatic, well you get the picture. I take these as compliments (I am sure that is how they were intended :). But living a practical life (sounds like a reality show) sometimes means I can overlook an opportunity to have fun that is not within the confines of the GTA. Now I want to be clear I have never been called a party pooper or boring (at least not to my face); I can have fun just as much as the next A-Type professional project manager.

Case in point; today we are all enjoying the fun of Great Wolf Lodge. Not a place I personally would opt to go to (staying at a hotel when I don't have to never really occurs to me as fun - curse of travelling a lot), but when you have kids, the places you end up are often not places we would have at the top of our Bucket List destination entries. But seeing our two run around, in and out of water geysers, speeding down water slide tubes, dumping buckets of water on unsuspecting passersby makes you realise that kids are all about fun. And their essence of fun is contagious.

So while my lips turned blue and I lost feeling in all my extremities, I am smiling while I shiver. The two hour drive in the snow; misguiding GPS, and lack of non-fast food food options - it was all worth it to see the look on E's face as she came screaming down the Niagara Rapids Run or J's smile as he surfed the waves in Rainbow Lake. And the grandfather looking a little pale at the bottom of the Woolly Mammoth gave me a great idea ... next time my parents can bring the kids, and I and G can do something more practical, like watch a marathon session of Monty Python movies. :)

If nothing changes, nothing changes

Day 4 Gratitude - Ability to adapt & change

My Mum is the source of today's posting title. It is something she has envoked to me on many an occasion (usually when I am bi***ing or complaining about something). What this has helped me understand over the years (see Mum, I was listening) is that there really is very little in your own world that you cannot affect.

Aldous Huxley, a pacifist, humanist, and writer said:

There's only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self.

This really captures my own quest for 2010.

In many facets of my life I am in the continuous pursuit of improvement; better life (health, education, fun ...) for my family, increase in my own skill set at work (writing, project management, knowledge) to my more personal pursuits of overall fitness (running, yoga, nutrition) and general pastimes (photography, gardening, home renovations). In these pursuits I often, as I think a lot of us do, look to outside sources and materials to affect the improvement. Whether it is buying the latest gadget be it a gardening tool, the latest running technical gear, or most up to date SLR camera, or subscribing to the litany of self-help/teaching magazines, RSS feeds or journals, where I think we really need to start is with what we have at that moment; ourselves.

Start with a recognition that if we truly work with the gifts (patience, time, health, intellegience, strength, will, ...) we are all given to improve at something; whether it is something that comes easily, or something that we have to work at to even achieve a modicum of mediocrity, giving ourselves the permission to try and fail, and then try again adapting the next attempt from what we learned the first, second, third, .... time, then that is one of the best lessons we can learn.

So that is why I will encourage my children to stick with something they enjoy, no matter how tough it gets. And why I will continue to get up early on the weekends to sweat it out doing downward dogs and hill repeats. Because I recognise that when I stop paying attention in equal measure to my successes and failures that this is when my corner of the universe will stop improving.

It's not just about giving.

Day 3 Gratitude - Ability to give and receive graciously

So in giving a gift, is it all about the intended recipient, or is it about the giver as well?

A gift, whether for a formal event such as birthdays or anniversaries, or in recognition of a special occasion such as a wedding, birth or achievement, or simply because you were thinking of someone and wanted to do something nice just cause, is the gift really just for the recipient or is the act of giving part of the whole "feel good" package? And is it the recipient's responsibility to ensure that the gift giver gets their owed "warm & fuzzies"?

Nay I say. The thought (and follow through) of the giving on the part of the giver (sounds a bit like a riddle) in itself should be suffice. To expect, and want, and need, a lavishing of praise and thanks from the receiver to get your own quotient of feel-good feelings says something about you and the nature of the act. Whether the gift is received with whole-hearted thanks, or greeted with more of a "Gee, thanks?" the fact that you took the time, thought and effort (not sure if re-gifting from the basement grab bag at the last minute counts) should be enough.

That being said, the gift receiver, if truly living a philosophy of Gratitude, should be able, regardless of the gift and how close (or off) the mark it hits personally, to give back to the sender a genuine thanks, if not for the gift itself (really, does anybody actually like smelling like a basket of fruit?), but for the kindness in deed it represents.
So the next time you Aunt Marge sends a set of placemats made from old shoe laces, or your significant other brings home a bunch of carnations (note to all men - wild flowers, roses, gerberas = more brownie points than carnations unless of course your better half has explicitly expressed an admiration for carnations), be sure and pen a heartfelt Thank-you card (a topic for another day) to Aunt Marge, or plant a big kiss on your other half in recognition of their thoughtfulness and be truly grateful that someone cared enough about you to think of you.

PS: And don't bury AM's placemats too deep in the basement, you want to be able to pull them out in time for her next visit. :)

Addressing the obvious

Day 2 Gratitude - My Life

As things go, I have it pretty good; a loving, supportive and healthy family, great friends, a comfortable home, good job, food in the fridge, clothes on my back ... and the list goes on. So right off the bat, this is an obvious choice for a gratitude.

JFK once said:

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."

This to me encapsulates what most of us need to work on (myself included). There are always going to the Jones, Smiths, ... that have a bigger flat screen TV, newer vehicle, better (insert item of envy here) than you have. That is life; get over it already. I can't just sit and write a few hundred words each day and then be able to label myself as a truly grateful individual. To earn that title, we all have to walk the talk and invoke actions of gratitude everyday. And the funny thing is, is that it is usually the little things often make the big impression; holding the door for someone, saying bless you/Gadzundheit, even smiling at a stranger can make that person's day a whole lot brighter.

So today, as I take stock in my life, and all that I have to be grateful for in it, I challenge you to do the same and make somebody else life a little bit better by expressing your gratitude in a random act of kindness.

So much to be thankful for ... where do I start?

Day 1 Gratitude - Freedom

It may sound cliche, okay, it definitely sounds cliche, but the fact that I can decide on my way home from work to start a blog that could reach thousands, or even millions of readers (although I would be happy with just more than my sister and dogs reading on a even semi-regular basis) is truly amazing. That my country offers me the freedom to speak my mind, even in run-on sentences, without any kind of policing (grammar or otherwise) should not be taken for granted. (Imagine "O Canada" playing softly in the background?)

That is why, as I crept along the 401 (all you GTA'ers can relate) listening to the news, I decided to give myself more purpose and take up a four-days-after new year's resolution (and I NEVER make resolutions) which is to;

• Focus on the positive,
• Not say anything if I can't say something nice,
• Be thankful for what I have,
• Make my own destiny,
• .... you get the picture.

So for the next 364 days, I will be diligently working to integrate an Attitude of Gratitude into my daily practices. Whether it is running on a particularly cold Canadian winter day at 5 am, volunteering at my children's schools, or stuck on the DVP in rush hour traffic; I will find something to be truly thankful for everyday.

And if only one person reads this for the whole year, and it makes their day even a little brighter, then I will be thankful that too.